Disney releases new batch of genetically engineered TV stars
Disney has released a new batch of genetically engineered teenagers for its new season television shows. It’s just like putting the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle together, resident Disney IVF engineer Andrew Roark told The Onion News Network. Teen heartthrob Mitchel Musso, for example, is model 6831-A, a standard male base with Type 3 skin pigmentation. To save costs, engineers normally use the same DNA base with minor variations in the hair and skin colour. New techniques allow unprecedented ethnic blends and future models could even be capable of nuance and subtlety, The Onion reports.
Well, if you buy any of that, we have a bridge to sell you at a once-only discount. But at least this clever spoof from “America’s finest news network” shows one possible avenue of commercial development if genetic engineering were ever to take off.
- How long can you put off seeing the doctor because of lockdowns? - December 3, 2021
- House of Lords debates assisted suicide—again - October 28, 2021
- Spanish government tries to restrict conscientious objection - October 28, 2021
More Stories
Belgian health care boss says euthanasia is the solution to an ageing population
The president of Belgium's biggest health care fund, Christian Mutualities (CM), has called for a radical solution to the problem...
Guidelines on gender related treatment let children down, says major UK report
A long-anticipated review has delivered a savage blow to guidelines for transgender medicine in the United Kingdom. The final report...
Trump plays it safe on abortion
Former president Donald Trump has finally unveiled his policy on abortion, which promises to be an incendiary issue in the...
Vatican reaffirms critique of surrogacy and transgenderism in new document
Earlier this week the Vatican published a 16,000-word document reaffirming Catholic condemnations of a wide range of moral issues, from...
What’s all the fuss about genetic parenthood?
Some bioethicists question the importance of a genetic relationship between parents and children. What matters, they argue is a supportive...
UK lesbian couple swap embryos and carry each other’s child
Another dispatch from the Reproductive Revolution. A lesbian couple in the United Kingdom have successfully given birth to two boys through...